(Two Frenchmen stand in front of a diagram of a sheep adapted
for flying. They speak rapidly in French, much of it pseudo.)
First Frenchman: (JOHN) Bonsoir - ici nous avons
les diagrammes modernes d'un mouton anglo-français ... maintenant
... baa-aa, baa-aa... nous avons, dans la tête, le cabinc. Ici, on
se trouve le petit capitaine Anglais, Monsieur Trubshawe.
Second Frenchman: Vive Brian, wherever you are.
First Frenchman: D'accord, d'accord. Maintenant,
je vous présente mon collègue, le pour célèbre, Jean-Brian
Zatapathique.
(Transfers his moustache to Second Frenchman)
Second Frenchman: Maintenant, le mouton ... le
landing ... les wheels, bon.
(Opens diagram to show wheels on sheep's legs.)
First Frenchman: Bon, les wheels, ici.
Second Frenchman: C'est formidable, n'est ce pas
... (unintelligibly indicates motor at rear of sheep)
First Frenchman: Les voyageurs ... les bagages
... ils sont ... ici!
(Triumphantly opens the rest of the diagram to reveal the
whole brilliant arrangement. They run round flapping their arms and
baa-ing. Cut to pepperpots in supermarket with off-screen
interviewer.)
First Pepperpot: Oh yes, we get a lot of French
people round here.
Second Pepperpot: Ooh Yes.
Third Pepperpot: All over yes.
Interviewer: And how do you get on with these
French people?
First Pepperpot: Oh very well.
Fourth Pepperpot: So do I.
Third Pepperpot: Me too.
First Pepperpot: Oh yes 1 like them. I mean,
they think well don't they? I mean, be fair- Pascal.
Second Pepperpot: Blaise Pascal.
Third Pepperpot: Jean-Paul Sartre.
First Pepperpot: Yes, Voltaire.
Second Pepperpot: Ooh! - Rene Descartes.
(Rene Descartes is sitting thinking. Bubbles come from his
head with 'thinks '. Suddenly he looks happy. In a thought bubble
appears 'I THINK THEREFORE I AM '. A large hand comes into picture
with a pin and pricks the thought bubble. It deflates and
disappears. After a second, Rene disappears too.)