The Meaning of Life Script
The Adventures of Martin Luther
NARRATOR #1: The Adventures of Martin Luther,... an exciting
and controversial examination of the Protestant reformer whose
re-assessment of the role of the individual in Christian belief shook
the foundations of a post-feudal Germany in the grip of the sixteenth
century. It was a day much like any other in the quiet little town of
Wittenberg. Mamie Meyer was preparing fat for the evening meal when the
full force of the Reformation struck.
HYMIE MEYER: Mamie! Martin Luther's out!
MAMIE MEYER: Ohh! Martin Luther! Mmh.
MAMIE: Did you get the suet, Hymie?
HYMIE: Oy veh! The suet I clean forgot. Look out; here he
MAMIE: Girls! Girls!
MAMIE: Your father forgot the suet!
AUDREY MEYER: Ooohhhh.
MYRTLE MEYER: Ohh.
HYMIE: Hello, Martin.
MARTIN LUTHER: H-- How-- Where's the john?
HYMIE: Uh, we don't have one.
AUDREY and MYRTLE: [giggling]
MARTIN: Hhh! Do you need any cleaning inside?
HYMIE: Oh, no. Today it's all going fine.
MARTIN: Ahhh. Oh, well, uh, how's about showing me the
HYMIE: Martin, I got a woman and children in there.
MARTIN: So! There's no problem. I just look at a few spoons,
HYMIE: Well, I got two girls in there, Martin. You know what I
MARTIN: Honest! I don't look at your girls. I-- I don't think
about them. There!
I put them out of my mind. Their arms, their necks, their little legs
and bosoms, I wipe from my mind!
HYMIE: You just want to see the spoons?
MARTIN: My life! That's what I want to see!
HYMIE: I know I'm going to regret this.
HYMIE: Mamie! Guess who's come to see us?
MAMIE: Hymie! Are you out of your mind, already?! You know how
old your daughters are!
HYMIE: He-- He only wants to see the spoons!
MAMIE: Well-- Well, what do you have to bring him into my
HYMIE: Mamie, he doesn't think about girls any more.
MARTIN: Uh, Mrs. Meyer, as far as girls is concerned, I shot
MAMIE: You shot your wad?
MAMIE: Which spoons do you want to view?
MARTIN: Oh, I guess the soup spoons.
MAMIE: Now they're good spoons!
MARTIN: You got 'em arranged?
MAMIE: No, but I could arrange them for you.
MARTIN: Oh, don't put yourself to no bother, Mrs. Meyer.
MAMIE: It's no bother. I want for you to see these spoons like
I would want to see them myself.
MARTIN: Aww, you're too kind, Mrs. Meyer. You could get your,
eh, daughters to show me them.
MAMIE: Hymie! Get him out of here!
HYMIE: Mamie! Mamie! He only said for Audrey and Myrtle to
show him the spoons.
MAMIE: Like you think I'm running some kind of bordello here?!
MARTIN: Mrs. Meyer, how can you say such a thing?
MAMIE: Listen, Martin Luther! I know what you want to do with
MARTIN: Show me the spoons, ehh?
MAMIE: You want for them to pull up their skirts...
AUDREY and MYRTLE: [giggling]
MAMIE: ...and then lean over a chair with their legs apart.
HYMIE: Mamie, don't get excited.
MAMIE: I'm getting excited?! It's him that's getting excited!
MARTIN: My mind is on the spoons!
MAMIE: But you can't stop thinking of those little girls over
HYMIE: Oh, oh, I got to go to the bathroom.
MAMIE: Hymie, I'm a married woman!
HYMIE: So! Just show him the spoons!
MAMIE: And you don't want to put nothing up me?
MARTIN: Mrs. Meyer, you read my mind.
[chorus singing 'Hallelujah']
NARRATOR: Yes, another convert for the Protestants. But
despite Luther's efforts to promote the idea of sex for pleasure,
children multiplied everywhere.