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Life of Brian ScriptScene 30: Get Your Red Hot Calvary Souvenirs!The sketch:crucifixion party music ALFONSO: Ohh. Ohh. Ohh. Oh. Oh. SAINTLY PASSER-BY: Let me shoulder your burden, brother. Uh. ALFONSO: Oh, thank you. SAINTLY PASSER-BY: Uh. H-- hey! PARVUS: Oh, hey! What d'you think you're doing? SAINTLY PASSER-BY: Ah, i-- it's not my cross. PARVUS: Shut up and get on with it! MR. CHEEKY: Ah, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. He had you there, mate. Didn't he? That'll teach you a lesson. Hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo! baby crying SOUVENIR SHOPKEEPER: Souvenir of Calvary. Very nice little item, this. Wrap it 'round a lamp and the crosses twinkle on and off. Very nice. Doubles as a tablecloth or a curtain or-- JUDITH: No! SOUVENIR SHOPKEEPER: Totally washab-- Oh, Pilate at it again, eh? Well, how about this, then? A couple of crosses. One slightly damaged, only very sl--
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Life
of Brian Scripts
