|
|
|
Monty Python ScriptsBurglar / Encyclopedia SalesmanThe cast:
The sketch:(Scene : A front door of a flat. A man walks up to the door and rings bell. He is dressed smartly, like a Salesman.) Salesman: Burglar! (longish pause while he waits, he rings again) Burglar! (woman appears at other side of door) Woman: Yes? Salesman: Burglar, madam. Woman: What do you want? Salesman: I wart to come in and steal a few firings, madam. Woman: Are you an encyclopedia salesman? Salesman: No madam, I'm a burglar, I burgle people. Woman: I think you're an encyclopedia salesman. Salesman: Oh I'm not, open the door, let me in please. Woman: lf l let you in you'll sell me encyclopedias. Salesman: I won't, madam. I just want to come in and ransack the flat. Honestly. Woman: Promise. No encyclopedias? Salesman: None at all. Woman: All right. (she opens door) You'd better come in then. (Salesman enters tit rough door.) Salesman: Mind you I don't know whether you've really considered the advantages of owning a really fine set of modern encyclopedias...(he pockets valuable) You know, they can really do you wonders. (Cut back to man at desk.) Man: That man was a successful encyclopedia salesman. But not all encyclopedia salesmen are successful. Here is an unsuccessful encyclopedia salesman. (Cut to very tall building; a body flies out of a high window and plummets. Cut back to man at desk.) Man: Now here are two unsuccessful encyclopedia salesmen. (Cut to a different tall building; two bodies fly out of a high window. Cut back to man at desk.) Man: I think there's a lesson there for all of us.
|
|||||||
Monty
Python Scripts
