Voice Over: Meanwhile back in London ... at the British
Explorers' Club in the Mall...
(Cut to the leather-arm chaired hallway of a London club. In
four of the chairs sit men in polar explorers' kit -furs, iced-over
goggles, etc. - reading newspapers. At one chair sits a man in
Norfolk jacket and plus fours. Around his neck he wean a sign saying
'Our Hero'. He is reading a newspaper but obviously has something
else on his mind. Suddenly he throws the paper down and gets up. He
walks over to the porter's desk. As he does this a polar expedition
with four huskies, a sled, and two explorers pass him. Our Hero goes
up to the desk. A whiskery old porter stands behind it.)
Our Hero: Any news of Betty Bailey's expedition,
Hargreaves: Er ... um ... er...
Our Hero: (through clenched teeth) Page 9...
Hargreaves: (thumbing over page of script beneath
counter) 'The Lost World of Roiurama'.
Our Hero: That's my line.
Hargreaves: Oh, sorry. 'Where were they going, sir'?
Our Hero: The Lost World of Roiurama.
Hargreaves: Yes sir, we've got a telegram.
Our Hero: OH
Hargreaves: (reads it) Reads it. Expedition superb.
Weather excellent. Everything wonderful.
Our Hero: I wonder what's gone wrong.
Hargreaves: For God's sake be careful...
Our Hero: (irritably) Wait a minute... I'm going to
go... after them.
Hargreaves: For God's sake be careful, sir.
(Cut to film of the lost world. Tropical South American
vegetation. Our four explorers from Jungle Restaurant & Ken
Russell's Gardening Club sketches limp along exhaustedly.)
Second Explorer: My God, Betty, we're done for...
Third Explorer: We'll never get out of here... we're
completely lost, lost. Even the natives have gone.
First Explorer: Goodbye Betty, Goodbye Farquarson. Goodbye
Brian. It's been a great expedition...
(Music. Cut to engraving of Crystal Palace.)
SUPERIMPOSED CAPTION: 'CRYSTAL PALACE 1851'
(Cut immediately back to jungle.)
First Explorer: Great expedition .. ·
Third Explorer: All that'll be left of us will be a map, a
compass and a few feet of film, recording our last moments...
First Explorer: Wait a moment!
Fourth Explorer: What is it?
First Explorer: If we're on film, there must be someone
Second Explorer: My God, Betty, you're right!
(They all look around, then gradually all notice the camera.
They break out in smiles of relief, come towards the camera and
greet the camera crew.)
Third Explorer: Look! Great to see you!
First Explorer: What a stroke of luck!
Camera Crew: Hello! ...
First Explorer: Wait a minute!
Fourth Explorer: What is it again?
First Explorer: If this is the crew who were filming us .
.. who's filming us now? Look!
(Cut to another shot which includes the first camera flew and
yet another camera crew with all their equipment. The director is
dressed the same as Yakomoto, the director in 'Elizabeth L', only he
is blacked up.)
Director: (African accent) Cut there man! No! No
good! How we going to get feeling of personal alienation of self
from society with this load of Bulldog Drummond crop? When I was
doing 'La Notte' wi' dot Monica Vitti gal she don't gimme none of
this empire building shit, man ...
(Camera pans slightly to reveal a door in jungle. It opens and
an inspector enters.)
Inspector: Not so fast, Akarumba! Allow me to introduce
myself. I'm Inspector Baboon of Scotland Yard's Special Fraud Film
Director Squad, Jungle Division.
Fourth Explorer: Baboon of the Yard!
Inspector: Shut up! (shoots her) Right, Akarumba!
I'm arresting you for impersonating Signor Michelangelo Antonioni,
an Italian film director who co-scripts all his own films, largely
jettisoning narrative in favor of vague incident and relentless
character study . . . (during this harangue the credits start to
roll, music very faint beneath his words) ... In his first film:
'Cronaca Di Un Areore' (1950), the couple are brought together by a
shared irrational guilt. 'L'Amico' followed in 1955, and 1959 saw
the first of Antonioni's world-famous trilogy, 'L'Aw entura' - an
acute study of boredom, restlessness and the futilities and agonies
of purposeless living. In 'L'Eclisse', three years later, this
analysis of sentiments is taken up once again. 'We do not have to
know each other to love', says the heroine, 'and perhaps we do not
have to love...' The 'Eclipse' of the emotions finally casts its
shadow when darkness descends on a street corner. (the credits
end; voice and picture start to fade)... Signor Antonioni first
makes use of color to underline...
(Fade to black and at to BBC world symbol)
Continuity Voice: (talc) And now on BBC another six
minutes of Monty Python's Flying Circus.